Finding the Magic in Middle School – Chris Balme

I’ve generally found that middle school teachers are the hardest to hire.  Teachers either train with their eye on elementary school, and learn to teach towards those foundational skills and early developmental ages, or focus on high school, with the emphasis on more detailed content and more mature relationships.  Middle school can sometimes end up as an afterthought.  And yet, it may be (in my opinion) the most interesting age.  In these years, kids are still dependent on adults, and yet are learning not to be.  They have developed some life and learning skills, but not quite enough of them, or with the depth needed for true independence. Being a teacher at this age means knowing how to navigate this transition from dependence to independence: when to hold tight and when to let go, when to support and when to give space.  You still have to be an excellent pedagogue to teach middle school.  You can’t just rely on charisma, relationships and a deep knowledge of content like you can sometimes do in high school.  But if you don’t meet students at this age with the requisite respect and warmth, they won’t respond to you. 

For his ability to articulate the underlying reasons for why middle school is interesting (and complicated), and how to make the most of these years as a parent and teacher with very practical advice, I really enjoyed Finding the Magic in Middle School, by Chris Balme.  So much so that I bought a copy for each of my middle school teachers and their supervisors!

The first big insight for me was in Balme’s framing.  Everyone knows that middle school is a complicated social time, with changing relationships and changing bodies.  Balme makes the fascinating observation that middle school is the time when kids become aware that they are being watched by others, which helps explain why they become so self-conscious.  Through this awareness of being watched by others, they become more aware of their own social behaviors, and the different ways kids can behave socially.  As a result they try on different social postures, and for this reason we see it as an age when kids conform.  It’s not so much because they don’t feel comfortable in their own skin (though they don’t), but because they are trying to figure out which skin, which they are now newly aware of, fits them best.  They test out new ways of acting, and they don’t want to be too noticeable while doing so.  It’s something they grow out of, but this discovery-through-conformity is entirely normal. 

What complicates all of this is that while their social perception increases, their social interpretation is still very much developing and lags behind.  They are increasingly aware, but poor interpreters of what they observe.  This adds complication, especially for the adults, who are trying to help them learn. 

While the book is full of advice, the one I found most powerful is the notion that we as the teachers and parents are the curriculum.  They are observing us carefully for what’s normal and acceptable.  While this creates a lot of pressure and expectation, it’s also a good reason for us to be extra aware of our own behaviors and choices, especially those parts of our reactions that come from beneath the surface – maybe even from our own middle school challenges. 

One place where he felt out of step was around social media. Given that the book was only published two years ago, it’s amazing to think about how quickly the landscape has shifted in this respect.

Finding the Magic in Middle School is a pretty quick read.  The chapters are short, and it’s very practical.  Each chapter ends with a bullet point summary, which is good for review, or reading really quickly!

If you have kids approaching this age, and certainly if you are a teacher for middle schoolers, it’s a book you should certainly read. 

Just Because I Liked It:

1. Always read Matti Friedman.  This time, on the impact of the Kibbutz movement. 
2. I generally say I have an aphasia for poetry, but there are some exceptions.  I loved this article, and its subject, the poet Cid Corman.