There is a common dichotomy presented in the world of mental illness. On one side (and I simplify), evolving from Freud’s early influence on psychology, is that mental illness emerges from deep human drives combined with early life experiences. Its solution lies in talk therapy and self awareness. On the other side, mental illness is a reflection of our biology, and its solution lies in medication (and more lately, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy). Rachel Aviv’s stunning book, Strangers to Ourselves: Unsettled Minds and the Stories That Make Us, challenges this dichotomy through telling the stories of five people and their experience of mental illness. She suggests that mental illness is in fact much more complex. How it manifests is a combination of culture, social context, and the way in which we see ourselves – the stories that make us.
Aviv’s book emerges from her own experience. As a six year old, she was diagnosed with anorexia (which she likely did not have) and placed on ward with girls who suffered similarly. One of her reflections from that experience was the way in which a person’s identity could form around mental illness, that it wasn’t strictly something a person had or did not have. The consequence of this insight was that with a different ‘story,’ or identity, a person’s path could look very different. She then traces the lives of five people and their struggles with, and experiences of mental illness, to explore her ideas.
While each of the stories are tragic and painful in at least some form, in Aviv’s hands they are entirely non-judgemental, respectful, and yet remain honest to the challenges each person experienced. The one I found most fascinating was about an Indian woman named Bapu. In the Indian cultural context, where families are larger and much more supportive; where the state has far less control; and where religion has created a space for people like Bapu whose mental lives are non-normative, the experience of mental illness looks very different from what we’re used to in the West. While Bapu’s life could, at points, be terribly self-destructive, it could also be admired and meaningful in a way that seems hardly possible in a society that not only separates religion from the public space, but the mystical from everyday life.
Strangers to Ourselves was, in spite of the heaviness of its subject, a gripping book to read, full of interesting ideas and powerful stories.
Just Because I Liked It:
- If you can get a copy of the September 2023 Hakira journal, please take a look at the letter written by Rabbi Avraham Eliyahu Kaplan in 1919 titled “On Herzel” (and translated for the journal by Rabbi Nethaniel Helfgot). Rabbi Kaplan was a student of the great yeshivot of Lithuania, particularly Slobodka, and a dedicated Zionist. There were two things that make the letter so powerful. The first, and most fascinating for an Eastern European yeshiva Jew, was how much he valued Herzel for giving Jews back their pride by bringing the Jewish nationalist cause into the public space. For this, Rabbi Kaplan says, he should be deeply admired and valued. This was against the traditional, quiet diplomacy of the religious community and previous generations. That Rabbi Kaplan could recognize this, and praise it so publicly, is fascinating. The other is his prescient understanding of the importance of Zionism, so many years before it was a realistic enterprise.
- Take 90 seconds to learn from the great actor Michael Caine about “Using the Difficulty” in this clip.
- I can’t seem to stop listening to material that digs into the deep inconsistencies and moral blindness in the ‘progressive left,’ especially around Israel. In this episode of The Comedy Cellar, Noam Dworman (host) interviews the former head of Humans Rights Watch, and was particularly revealing.